Cat in the Dessert

Friday, April 25, 2008

My Hotel California

As anyone knows, "Hotel California" has some of the most misheard lyrics of any popular song. And when it came out, there was no internet to see the correct text, and we had to do with listening to scratchy records. Plus it being in a non-native language, and about foreign things (I had no idea that a mission like the song referred to was supposed to have a bell, hah!), my cherished interpretation of the text was far from the truth. Now, of course, I know what the real text is supposed to be, but still, when listening to the song, I hear my version.

On a dark desert highway, coolin' in my hair,
Once there a polete dust, rising up through the air.
Up ahead in the distance, I saw a shimmer of a light.
I had to heavy in the side motel, I had to stop for the night.
And she stood in the doorway, with a mission mell.
I was thinking to myself this could be heaven and this could be hell.
And she lit up a candle, and she showed me the way;
there were porches down the corridor, but I heard them say:

"Welcome to the hotel California,
such a lovely place, such a lovely face.
Ready a room at the hotel California,
any time of year, you can find it here."

Her mind is stiff and it twisted, she's got a worse and this mends;
she got a lot of pretty pretty boys, she calls mens.
On a dance in the courtyard, sweet summer sweat;
some that's to remember, some that's to forget.
So I called up the captain, please bring in my wife.
He said "we haven't had that spirit yet since nineteen sixty-nine".
And still those porches were falling far, far away.
Wake you up in the middle of the night, just to hear them say:

"Welcome to the hotel California,
such a lovely place, such a lovely face.
The livin’ it up at the hotel California,
what a nice surprise with your alibis."

Mirrors on the ceiling, the pink champagne on ice.
She said: we’re locked prisoners here, but they’re only dice.
And in the master’s chambers they gathered public feast.
They stab it with their steely knives, but they just can’t kill the beast.
Last thing I remember, I was running for the door;
I had to find the passage back to the place I was before.
Relax, said the night man, you are around here, you see.
You can check out anytime you like, but you can never leave.

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